Happy Halloween!

Haute Couture Bedding

The art of window displays is serious business here, and the kitschier the better! Here's a very tame bridal shop's window:

Even the bedding industry is in on it. Not only must your duvet cover look great on the bed, it must also be wearable for a variety of different occasions. Here's a nice day look for an afternoon in the country. I'm glad to know if I purchased this, that the blue and floral pillows can also function as accessories!

Here's a more Grecian look. Note dove on shoulder.

You can't see it here, but there are more doves hanging from the ceiling suspending her head wreath midair.

Lastly, formal wear. I've already purchased this outfit for the first ship naming ceremony. I LOVE the train!

What, this old thing? I just rolled out of bed.

Jiangyin in pictures

Just an assortment of recent photos around town....

Remaining tower and section of old city wall

The many uses of bicycle carts:

They're excellent for an afternoon nap.

They make an ideal FedEx truck.

And don't forget they are the perfect surface on which to dry your shop's fresh pasta out on a sidewalk!

Alternatively, you can also dry your pasta on a clothes rack with mops, shoes and rags for added flavor.

Just liked all the colors

More scenes from the grocery store:

Dried jellyfish. If only the selection wasn't so limited!

Squid & mussels.

petrified fish

More delectable dried fish options

A Chinese love affair

The Chinese love their fireworks. LOVE. Here fireworks reach a whole new level of noisy obnoxiousness. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I grew up in a state where fireworks were legal. I'm pretty sure though, that all self-respecting Chinese would scoff at my annual "look I'm the Statue of Liberty" sparkler routine. Sparklers were the best! And screeching yellow jackets, and kamikaze pinwheels that would fly off their mounts or be nailed to a tree (maybe Dad was Chinese in a prior life?).

Fireworks in China are a must for every wedding, funeral, and holiday and can be heard 24/7/365. They seem more intrigued by the loud heart-stopping booms (that are WAY louder than anything we ever had in Oregon!) than the visual aspect of it, as at-home displays seem to happen in the middle of the day more often than not. When we first moved here, we'd scurry out to the porch at night to watch the massive displays as soon as we'd hear the first few booms.  Then on National Day I was actually trapped in our apartment for two hours while our downstairs neighbors set off the loudest fireworks ever, right outside the only door to our building. Let's just say the bloom is off the rose.

Fortunately, here in Jiangyin, they've figured out how to turn the dial to 11. There are 3 or 4 of these trucks that drive around down, deafening the local population. On a normal day they are used for military recruitment. But you can also hire them for any occasion or parade. More than once I've had the misfortune of being on the sidewalk while these drive by. A grandpa actually laughed at me as I plugged my ears and cringed the other day. I still want to be able to hear when I'm his age, thank you very much!

A squat in the park

In almost any other country I would giggle at this photo--thinking the porta potties were whisked away but the signage accidentally left in place, giving passersby a good chortle. Here in China though, I'm not so sure. I mean, I've honestly seen a grown man making #2 in a park just 10 yards from a free public restroom (more on that in a separate post). Regardless of whether this restroom has been torn down, or is constructed just as intended, I just pray I never need to use it.

Spotted right here in Jiangyin's Huangshanhu Park, literally 3 feet from the path.

Food Fight Returns!

Thanks to Amanda for reminding me I haven't posted a mystery food item in quite some time. I guess it is a sign we're getting used to most of the stranger food we're presented with here? Brian has actually had this "delicacy" while I've managed to avoid it. Use the comments section to guess not only what animal, but specifically what part of the animal, you think this is. This time the winner's prize is NOT having to eat it.

Asian Octuple Threat

Forget about the many mere triple threats who can only sing, act and dance. Jiangyin is presently drowning in posters and billboards for the upcoming Jay Chou concert in November. Not only can he sing (and play piano, cello, Chinese flute, zither and drums) and act (he's in the Green Hornet), but he can, most importantly, do kung fu. IMDB tells me he particularly enjoys using nunchucks, but for "leisure purposes only." I'm glad they clarified that for us.

As I read further I see he's also written a book, owns his own record company, multiple restaurants, clothing stores and an antique business. I'm starting to wonder if his mom is the author of "Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother?"

My most pressing question though, is where can we get this outfit for Brian for Halloween?

Dumplings 101

Nearly a month ago Stella's parents came over to teach us how to make dumplings. For $15 we bought enough ingredients to feed an army! We learned to make the dough for dumplings as well as both pork and beef fillings. Stella's dad also made us a tofu salad (that was delicious!) and spare ribs. Rather than using recipes, everything seems to be eyeballed and learned from trial and error. Stella was translating multiple conversations at once while I frantically took notes, hoping we can repeat this meal for our families when were home and not land in the 'error' column.

The fillings consist of meat, ginger, onions, and really whatever else you like. We added mushrooms, a vegetable I identify as "leafy celery stuff" in my notes and rice stems.

Rice stems--you peel them and just use the white hearts.

You'll also need:

Three kinds of soy sauce, oyster sauce, rice vinegar, rice wine and sesame oil for the filling.

An oatmeal lid and tape for an irrationally angry smoke detector.

The dough is just like pasta dough--flour, water and egg. We got an assembly line going--rolling out the wrappers, stuffing and pleating. I think it's fair to say we were responsible for the bottle neck.

Delicious dried tofu salad with a soy dressing and cilantro.

Spare ribs

Final product with a vinegar/soy/garlic/cilantro sauce

yummers

After the five of us gorged and gorged on all the good food we still had about 80 dumplings left over. This is when we learned the very shallow drawer in our freezer isn't for ice cube trays (this much we knew), it is for freezing fresh dumplings. We are so in the know!

lunch for the next week!

Frosting 101

What's the best way to practice writing Chinese characters?

In frosting of course! (I can't believe I haven't thought of this before!)

In the parks around town we'll see people of all ages practicing characters with massive paint brushes and water.

To practice with frosting, all you need is a Chinese colleague of your husband's who wants to learn how to cook. At her request, this afternoon we made bruschetta, spaghetti carbonara, and two cakes. Yes, two. Xu Li is my kind of gal! We took the chocolate cake out of the oven and then she asked if we could also make the yellow cake I'd made for Brian's birthday. How could I say "no?" Someone who is eating, let alone making, cakes for the first time has to be given the opportunity to decide if she's a chocolate cake or yellow cake kind of gal, right?! Thank goodness we ran out of time, so I couldn't show her how to make mashed potatoes. I thought living in China would be a much needed diet by default for me, but it has unfortunately proved otherwise. Oops!

My go at Xu Li's name

Xu Li's maiden voyage in frosting!

Straight to China aka God Bless Hulu

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm fully capable of vegging out to some fabulous trash TV. Heck, it was pretty much the evening agenda during my ''Single Ladies" Tanglewood summers. But HBOAsia takes it to new lows, making me curse bless my husband for introducing me to the enlightened programming of Operation Repo, even leading me to reconsider the possibility that "More to Love" perhaps actually IMPROVED my IQ back in the day.

Here in China, you can forget movies that go straight to DVD. (Oh how I would kill for such quality cinema!) Instead, China is mecca for (primarily sci-fi) American movies so laughable that they must skip DVD and go straight to TV in a non-English speaking country. Such is the lifeblood of HBOAsia. A channel created to torture expats, where the actors can deny all culpability, and the Western world can remain blissfully unaware.

Just so you all don't feel like you're missing out. I've assembled clips from some of our favorites. Now go pop some banana flavored popcorn and get watchin'!

Frost Giant: An explorer and his team search for a 19th century shipwreck off the coast of Antarctica. The team digs up an alien ice creature that (spoiler alert) kills the explorers and heads to the mainland, where it begins sucking the heat energy from Earth.

Dinocroc vs. Supergator: Enough said.

Sharktopus: A military weapons experiment goes horribly wrong.

Osmosis Jones--I think Bill Murray apologized for the wrong movie in Zombieland (one of the primo movies to air here on HBOAsia!)

Triassic Attack: A Native American owner of a kitschy roadside museum accidentally brings to life three dinosaur fossils. Really annoyed, the giant dinos wreak havoc on the small town and the local university.

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant: Bizarre tale of a boy who wants to become a vampire. Featuring several recognizable Hollywood actors who were apparently desperate for a paycheck in 2009.

Dinosapien: An afternoon children's show, just so the kids aren't left out of the mutant Dinocroc/Supergator/Sharktopus fad. When searching for a clip online, it is frightening how many languages this show has been dubbed in!

Now those of you dedicated enough to read/watch this far, here's where we need your help. We've been eyeing this DVD at the local corner store. We've come close to buying it, but can't bring ourselves to waste $1.42 on it. I see on imdb.com it actually opened on two whole screens in May 2011, so perhaps you've all already seen it. But if you, the discerning public cry out, we are willing to watch it so we can keep you fully informed. Just let us know. We're here for you!

Hobo with a Shotgun: A homeless vigilante blows away crooked cops, pedophile Santas, and other scumbags with his trusty pump-action shotgun.